On the Edge (Again)

I’ve been feeling nervous lately.  Really nervous.  As in, thinking about going back to Idaho and my brain goes haywire thinking about all the things that can go wrong.  Thinking about how I have no idea how to function in American society and yet I have to navigate the whole tricky process of renting a house and getting electricity and a phone and internet and all that other stuff one needs to do when moving into a new house.  I need to register my car and get all our stuff out of storage.  Our To-Do List is growing longer by the minute.

But I couldn’t figure out why I was so nervous.  I’m just going back to Boise, how hard can that be?

This morning as I stood in the shower and warm water trickled down my body, I realized I’m feeling the exact same way I felt three years ago as I stared at those eight boxes stacked in my driveway.

I feel like I’m standing on the edge of a cliff – about to throw myself off into the abyss below. No safety net, no idea how far down, no nothing. Just jump, and hope like hell that someone reaches out His hand and catches us.

boxes in driveway

And that’s when it hit me – what I’m feeling is nothing more than your normal ol’ pre-adventure jitters.

So that confirms it – I’m moving on to another adventure.  Just like three years ago, I have no idea where I’m going. I have no safety net.  No idea where I’ll land.  I’m just going to jump and we’ll figure it out as we go.

I’m sitting here in our hostel staring at those six boxes stacked in our room and I wonder what adventures are to come.  It’ll be different from what we’ve been doing, that I know.  But I’m excited about the possibilities and wonder where this next adventure will take us.

And you know what?  Now that I’ve realized I’m heading off on a brand new adventure, I’m not nearly as scared.

all packed up

PS: John got the video of northern Argentina done!  I forgot how windy it was up there – way worse than Patagonia.  And we hadn’t expected it there…

books by Nancy Sathre-Vogel

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About Nancy Sathre-Vogel

After 21 years as a classroom teacher, Nancy Sathre-Vogel finally woke up and realized that life was too short to spend it all with other people's kids. She and her husband quit their jobs and, together with their twin sons, climbed aboard bicycles to see the world. They enjoyed four years cycling as a family - three of them riding from Alaska to Argentina and one exploring the USA and Mexico. Now they are back in Idaho, putting down roots, enjoying life at home, and living a different type of adventure. It's a fairly sure bet that you'll find her either writing on her computer or creating fantastical pieces with the beads she's collected all over the world.

7 thoughts on “On the Edge (Again)

  1. As my family and I embark across EU in a little RV (in 3 weeks), I am feeling those jitters mixed with a good measure of excitement. Your post here, and your whole adventure, has given me inspiration. Good luck on the next one.

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  2. Welcome back home! Pray tell me, what about that house of yours? Is it rented out permanently? Or are you only looking for an intermediate because you are, well, testing out where to go next already?

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  3. You got it Thomas. We have absolutely no idea what our future plans are, so don’t want to kick out great tenants who are taking wonderful care of our house. At this point, they have a lease until October, so that’t the earliest we could get into our house – if we decide to do that. Right now, we’ll rent while we get our thoughts sorted out.

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  4. This post gave me tingles because I know the exact feeling. I returned to Melbourne, Australia after two years spent living on a boat in the South Pacific and being completely cut off. It’s quite a shock to the system! A lot of patience is required to integrate back into the world and little, ‘normal’ things are extremely frustrating, like dealing with banks and internet service providers! Watching the news and TV advertising would get my heart racing, so I don’t watch TV.
    When I first returned to civilization, I couldn’t help but notice how addicted people were to their computers and phones. I was shocked. Now I’m one of those people :)

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